More Weight

Winter is coming. Sure, this stretch of fall weather has been beautiful, but things are changing. My morning walks were bright and sunny for a while, but now they’re mostly dark. My wardrobe has evolved from shorts and a t-shirt to shorts and a long sleeve, to pants and a hoodie. Winter is coming, and I feel the weight of snow and frozen ground pressing down upon my schedule.

I’m not sure why, but I remember studying the Salem Witch Trials in middle school. One gruesome detail stands out to me.

To force a plea from Giles Corey, an elderly farmer, they subjected him to a brutal practice called pressing—pinning him to the ground and piling heavy stones on his chest for days. He never relented. His last words before the stones crushed him to death were, famously, ‘more weight.’

That’s how I feel every fall as winter approaches.

It’s not the cold that feels heavy. And it’s not just that doing stonework in winter can be miserable. It’s the stress of unfinished projects, and the ones I planned to start before the ground freezes. How will I get it all done?

I do this to myself every year. It’s an annual cycle of overcommitting. Full of spring optimism, I always say yes to one project too many. With the long, warm days of summer ahead, I convince myself I’ll find a way to get it all done. Reality hits with the first autumn chill and I realize I’ve overbooked myself again.

Why do we keep asking for more weight?”